Fighting Our Pride
Humble yourself. Humble yourself. Humble yourself, because sometimes we allow our pride and egos to make us arrogant.
I never thought selling flowers and t-shirts next to a gas station would be something I could claim as personal experience. I felt pathetic standing out there for hours watching cars go by. I was analyzing the people around, wondering how they were depicting me. My thoughts were dominated with words like bum, broke, desperate, and insignificant. With these words flowing endlessly into mind, the greater the heat began growing inside my chest. My eyebrows began pulling down together as my eyes quickly filled with red. My body grew stiffer and my teeth and fist clinched tighter. I felt no different than a helpless man collecting change in a cup. And as a young man that experience was emasculating.
Why, what was the source of my angry? Was it my financial struggle? Was it the looks of disgust I was receiving from the people passing by? Or was it simply my pride? At that moment of my life I honestly didn’t care what the problem was. My energy was dark, my life was over, I was officially a failure. I lost hope. I was done….so I thought….
It took some time, but the solution became clear. That rage wasn’t just harming me, it was also fueling my pride and ego. Can you blame me? Standing on the side of the road selling t-shirts for a dollar isn’t a career goal we dream about as children. We don’t wake up wishing for our next opportunity to hustle. It’s a desperate act of survival. But you know what, that’s okay.
Times are tough, life may seem hard, but there’s beauty in the struggle. I couldn’t let my pride and ego control me mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. The ego is the enemy, and completely losing faith would have lead me down an inevitable path to self destruction.